i am changing

a song that keeps popping into my being, i know him by heart – vonda shepard. it’s the romantic side of me i know. believing that somewhere, at a time, that person will be there, beside me. everyone needs love. i need love. or am i just in-love with being in-love? to hell…

working my ass off. i have to complete the business acceptance testing of the this portal application. vonda shepard baring her soulto me. i opted not to go out this weekend. i just don’t want to. i am not tired, i’m just tired of going out. it’s getting pointless. i’m just aging i think and this things doesn’t not appeal to me as it used to be. at a coffee shop here in alabang. but not in my usual coffee shop. i’m in this quiet coffee shop, away from people. i want to enjoy my solitude; just me, my computer and a heaping, hot of cup o’ joe. mom’s at a wake since yesterday. i wasn’t able to go with her since i have office, and that i have to finish this testing.

i heard a lot of people leaving my old company. and also my current company. frankly, i am not that happy with my current company, but i’m sticking with it anyway. one thing is that i am not a quit-er. i stick out with what i have and exhaust all effort to make it work. and i’ve decided to make it work for me. occasional whining, but i guess is part of being a corporate slave. i just wish that these people have thought it over and over again. and that they did try to make it work. changing company is not an easy thing. for me, i find it very difficult to leave the comfort of knowing and settling in. but then again, i think they’re old enough to decide what’s best for them.

vonda just stopped singing. southern gal faith hill on the background if i’m not in love with you – faith hill. gawd, i wish someone’s with me now. quickly, shutdown iTunes. torturing myself… more coffee please.


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